


I'm Ready To Hope

by clare009



Category: Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: A/U, Gen, Still
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-26
Updated: 2014-05-26
Packaged: 2018-01-26 14:01:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1690871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clare009/pseuds/clare009
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl and Sophia escape the burning prison, but what is left for them?</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Ready To Hope

**Author's Note:**

> This is an A/U version of 'Still' where Sophia survives and escapes with Daryl instead of Beth. I only watched the ep once, so I've not included all the plot points/dialogue, but this is more of a re-imagining.

 

"They're gone, okay, all of them. We'll never see them again, Daryl. You've got to get over your fucking self and start figuring shit out, cuz I don't wanna become walker bait out here."

 

"Don't cuss, Sophia," Daryl said. He still refused to look at her, hiding behind the curtain of his hair as he made a show of sharpening a blunt arrow. It made her so mad, to the point where she could swear her blood was boiling.

 

She was mad at him and mad at the world, and mad at whatever divine entity had the sick sense of humor to put them here in the first place. Her mom had always told her to believe in Jesus, but Jesus had never seen what she'd seen. She'd seen her best friend get lost in the woods only to come stumbling out of a fucking barn as one of them. Daryl had put him down himself because Rick couldn't do it to his own son.

 

Her own mother was probably one of them now, too. Rick had banished her for trying to protect them, and Daryl hadn't been there to stop it. Daryl probably would have let Rick do it anyway, he could be such a pussy sometimes. She wasn't sure who she hated more in this moment. Sophia narrowed her eyes at the man sitting dejectedly on the fallen tree across the fire from her. She huffed out a breath and said, "I'm so done with this shit." Then she turned on her heel and stomped off through the trees, not bothering to see if he followed.

 

There were walkers out there and it was dark, but she didn't give a damn. Her mom had taken beatings from her dad for years before all of this while she'd stayed hidden under her bed. And she'd not even said a word to Rick when he came back to tell her what her mother had done and what he'd been forced to do. She'd only nodded and clutched baby Judith closer. And now Daryl just sat there, no plan, no nothing. Well, she had a plan, even though it was a dumb one.

 

"Sophia, wait," he called out after her. "You can't go running off. There's walkers."

 

"I know, Daryl," she flung the words behind her. "But you know what, I need a drink."

 

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

 

"You know. Alcohol. Booze. Liquor. Hooch. I never had one before. I think I have the right to at least have a fucking drink before I die."

 

He caught up to her and grabbed at her arm. "You're not gonna die."

 

"Don't give me that bullshit. Everyone is gone. Everyone. You can't pretend anymore that we're not next. What does it matter what we do?"

 

He gave her an uncertain look then glanced away. "Fine, whatever."

 

Sophia blinked. She'd expected him to put up a bit more of a fight, and when he didn't, it made her hesitate. But she couldn't back out now. "Fine. So what about that place we passed yesterday? That nice place. You said there wouldn't be food, but what about booze?"

 

Daryl snorted. "Yeah. That's fine if you want the pussy stuff that rich folk drink."

 

He made it sound as if it was something to be ashamed of. She kicked the dirt at her feet. "What else is there?"

 

"If you're gonna do this, then you can't do it in some half-assed way. It don't mean nothing otherwise."

 

"Then how?" Sophia jutted out her jaw. If Daryl thought he could scare her away with some heavy stuff, he was wrong.

 

He snorted again and muttered, "Dumbass kid," before he shouldered his crossbow and set off into the darkness of the woods. Sophia stood for a moment until she heard the crack of a branch behind her, then she set off at a run behind Daryl, her heart hammering inside her.

 

After a night and a day of walking, where Daryl was as closed mouth as ever, they finally came to a run-down abandoned shack in the middle of nowhere.

 

"I thought you knew where to find booze," Sophia said, eyeing the shack as they approached it. Daryl reached for the door and she flinched, expecting the whole structure to collapse on top of them.

 

"It's a still," he said. "Ever heard of moonshine?"

 

Sophia nodded. Her mom had always told her that her dad was mean as a snake whenever he drank, and moonshine made him meaner. Ed was always like that, though, whether he drank or not, so she couldn't tell the difference. He'd had some of the stuff one day, brought home in a jar from a friend of a friend. He'd found her watching him sniff the contents of the jar and had motioned her over to make her smell it, too. The gagging, cloying odor had almost made her sick. Ed had only laughed and sent her on her way. "I heard that it can make you blind."

 

"Nah." Daryl walked through the debris that littered the room, kicking up dust as he went. "This stuff is safe."

 

"How do you know?"

 

"Found it one day with Michonne when we were hunting the governor. Brought some back for Hershel and the Doc to use. Y'know, clean wounds and shit like that."

 

"And you can drink it?"

 

Daryl pulled a jar from the corner and turned to look at her. "Yeah. You're not gonna chicken out, are you?"

 

Sophia bobbed up and down on her toes. "Nope." She scanned the shack and wrinkled her nose at the amount of trash and the odd assortment of items it contained. "This place sucks, though."

 

Daryl glared at her. "Yeah, well I grew up in a place like this." He pointed at a tattered recliner. "My old man would sit in a chair just like that. He'd yell for you from that chair and you'd better come, and you knew if he had to get out of it to come and find ya there'd be hell to pay."

 

Sophia nodded. Ed had been like that, too. "What about your mama?"

 

"What do you care about my mama, do you want to drink or not?"

 

"Yeah, I guess." Sophia gingerly cleared away a spot to sit in front of a small table and waited for Daryl to rustle up a couple of tin cups that were cleaner than the others to drink out of. He poured the clear liquid from the jug and pushed Sophia's portion across the table to her. She picked up the cup and sniffed the contents. The sharp smell made her recoil, but she saw that Daryl was already knocking his back, so she took a defiant sip.

 

The alcohol burned her mouth and throat and made her choke. She coughed and spluttered. "How the heck can you drink this?"

 

Daryl shrugged. "Don't be such a light-weight."

 

She glared at him. "You can't expect me to be an expert when I've never done this before." She tentatively took another sip, and the liquid still burned like fire, but now that she knew what to expect, at least she didn't choke. She tried to school her features. "It's not so bad." Daryl raised an eyebrow at her. Sophia finally allowed herself to grimace. "Okay, it's awful."

 

"Well now ya know." Daryl didn't seem to be having any trouble draining the rest of his and pouring another measure for himself.

 

Sophia frowned. "Hey, this stuff is pretty potent. Maybe you shouldn't be drinking so much."

 

"I thought nothing mattered anymore."

 

She fiddled with the edge of her cup, looking down into the clear liquid. She could see the patches of rust distorted on the bottom of the cup. "It doesn't."

 

"Then if you don't mind, I'm gonna get shitfaced." Daryl gulped down some more and poured again.

 

After a moment, Sophia set her cup down. Her dad had been mean, drunk or not, but she remembered how he used to come home from the bar, reeking, and her mom had always sent her to her room. Sophia would hide, under the bed, or in the closet until the yelling had stopped. In the morning, her mom would always have fresh bruises, and she knew she'd have to take extra special care not to do anything that would piss Ed off.

 

She looked around at the shack. There were some faded pictures tacked to the wall, ripped from some magazine. A car. A half naked woman. A gun. "Did you really grow up in a place like this?" she said to Daryl.

 

"Yeah. What of it?"

 

"We had a nice house. It wasn't as big as Carl's, but it was nice. Mama kept it clean. Daddy inherited it from my great grandma when she passed. We used to live in an apartment before that."

 

"And now your Daddy's gone. So's Carl."

 

"And Mama." She heard Daryl make a sound between a choke and a sob, and when she looked at him, she could see his hands shake as he set down his cup. "Well, she is. She may as well be dead."

 

He smashed the cup to the side, making her jump. "Don't you think I fucking know that?"

 

Sophia hugged her arms to herself and tried to make herself small. She knew Daryl had a temper, but he'd never struck her. What if drinking made him mean like Daddy?

 

He stood and began to pace up and down the hut, clenching and unclenching his hands. Sophia watched without saying a word until Daryl stopped in front of a wall and slammed his fist into it. The wall shook and Sophia let out an involuntary cry. Daryl froze and spun to face her. "What? Do you think I'm gonna beat you like your daddy beat your mama? You think I could do that?"

 

Her heart was pounding, and she wanted to run, but she couldn't move. At least with the walkers she'd know what to expect.

 

Daryl's hardened face crumpled and he turned away to bury his face in his arm while he leaned against the wall.

 

When he didn't move, Sophia began to breathe more easily and the terror started to fade. After a moment, she stood and walked over to put a hand on his back. He flinched.

"I'm sorry, Daryl," she said.

 

"Don't. Ain't your fault."

 

"It's not yours, either."

 

"I coulda done more. I should never have stopped looking for the Governor. I couldn't even save your friend when he got lost in the woods. And… and… I shoulda been there for your mama."

 

"Mama can take care of herself. You can't blame yourself for the other stuff." She leaned in and wrapped her arms around his middle to hug him. She knew he hated hugs, but if anyone needed one right now, it was him. It was both of them, really. "I don't blame you, Daryl."

 

A shudder ran through him and he turned and clung to her. For the first time Sophia felt like they could share their pain together.

 

After a while, Daryl let her go and quickly dashed his sleeve across his eyes. He knelt down in front of her and said, "Soph, you're my family now, okay. We're gonna do this, we're gonna beat this together. For your mama."

 

She nodded. "She'd want that."

 

They shouldered their packs and left the shack behind. A few days later, they came across a sign pointing them in the direction of Terminus. For the first time since the prison, she felt a stirring of hope beneath her chest. There were others out there. Maybe they could start again. She could see the same look in Daryl's face and she smiled. Then, another thought occurred to her.

 

"Daryl," she said, "What if mama was able to survive on her own and she found this sign, do you think she'd go there?"

 

He glanced at her, and the transformation of his face was remarkable. "Yeah, I think she might."

 

She gave him a nod and set off down the tracks, knowing he'd be following after her.

 

 


End file.
